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Sample Testimonial Makeovers
"Before" Versions

An excerpt from the publication, Secrets of Mouthwatering Marketing Copy, by Marcia Yudkin.  Get more details or order your copy now. 

Misconceptions about testimonial quotes from clients and customers are rampant, weakening Web sites that fail to use the full power of these marketing tools.  For instance, longer is not better, and unsigned testimonials add little credibility, even for a professional service where confidentiality is appropriate.

Here are eight blurbs that I found posted on the Web.  See if you can analyze various marketing pitfalls that they exemplify.

The "Before" Versions

  1. "Prior to learning about CBSI, I was disabled and unemployed with back problems. I now have people helping me and I expect my income to double." – M.B.

  2. Rudy, Exelrod & Zieff LLP has been very pleased with results of its website developed through Because our firm is easily locatable through the major search engines, we are finding that numerous people are contacting us who otherwise would not. Additionally, handles modifications of our website easily and otherwise provides good service. 
    Alan Exelrod, Rudy, Exelrod & Zieff LLP,

  3. "Kidspiration is fun! Students will think they are playing while they are engaged in language development, concept building, and acquiring a variety of learning skills such as classification and sight word knowledge." - Renee Schorr, Early Childhood Teacher, Winship Elementary School, Brighton, MA

  4. I just wanted to send you a note that I am very pleased with the flowers. You did a fabulous job!!! Please add me to your list of references as I would be glad to give you a good reference. Thank you again for all your help! - Claudine

View the "After" versions now.

  1. "The flexibility of your software is a major reason why we selected Synygy. I do not believe your competition is as flexible as they say"

  2. "I am pleased to extend and share my experience in using as one of our recruitment resources. With the recent advertisement in, we received overwhelming responses from all over Malaysia and managed to achieve our hiring plan successfully. We considered the services provided were excellent with a comprehensive package which allowed us less selection time frame for potential candidates selection." - BI Technologies, Ismail Mohamed, HR Manager 

  3. "Your tapes are like gold to me! I was overweight, a junk food eater, never exercised, a complete mess. I've listened to my tapes (approximately 4 years now), and they have helped me more than anything. I listen all night on an auto-reverse tape player. Thanks so much." - Phyllis Hoga, Warren, OH

  4. Charles Cordes, Automotive Engineer: 
    I enjoy work that uses my hands, so I do a lot of different crafts. I have been using Cure-dents® for years, but just recently found how wonderful they are for craft work. Cure-dents® are very strong, resistant to chemicals of all sorts and economical enough I can keep plenty around. 

Think about the plusses and minuses of these promotional blurbs. How would you identify and fix the flaws in each? When you're ready, view my comments and rewrites.

Or buy a copy of Secrets of Mouthwatering Marketing Copy, which contains these "befores" and "afters," so that you may study them at your leisure.  More info.


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